Delusions

I realized today after reading some of my own posts that I have disconnected myself from expressing my own views and emotions, wondering constantly about the reactions I’ll receive. The fear of answering negative feedbacks has taken over a good chunk of my personality and I need to get over it for sure.

Life has come to a whole different deal now. I’m no more someone who I used to be. I cannot categorize it as a good change or bad change because it would be too early to judge myself in a different scenario. But the highlight of my personality change is the fact that I’m more of a silent listener now rather than a talker. I only respond to what is being said. And perhaps that’s the best way to go about it when you start a new relationship with new people. Gradually things start lying in the place and the outcome is fairly in your favour.

When you get married, you ultimately develop an association with people known by your spouse. You become a part of casual conversations , formal events , on weddings and deaths and perhaps on birthdays too haha. Pretty much everything seems special. The art is to handle the attention well and respond to it gracefully. A lot of it might be just pure observation to get to know you. So yeah its all about handling with care :-)

I’ll pause it here which means that the next post is going to give you an insight of what has been up :-)

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3 thoughts on “Delusions

  1. I have to say, this post of yours gave me a relief that I’m not the only one who thinks this way or has similar feelings. I was a weekly blogger, if not daily till last year when I stopped writing just because.. and I’m going to quote you here, “…I have disconnected myself from expressing my own views and emotions, wondering constantly about the reactions I’ll receive. The fear of answering negative feedbacks has taken over a good chunk of my personality…”

    I myself stopped writing a few months after my marriage though I have piles and plies of incidents to write about. I have so much going on that I want to write about and I always want to, but I end up not doing it because I feared the reactions and comments I would receive. But I shall resume from today IA.

    Thanks Umme :), your post was a great help to get me back on track. :)

    • kulsoom says:

      This made me feel so much better about myself that finally I am trying to come out of my shell and I found you sharing the same feelings with me :) Let both of us write about what we have been going through and am pretty sure a lot of other women would wana hear us!

      You are welcome Hibah. Keep up your blogging spirits high and never look back :)

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